Instead, look at their face for a second. Soak in their persona. And then let a big, warm, responsive smile flood your face and overflow into your eyes. The split-second delay convinces people your flooding smile is genuine and only for them. To soften the edge you can still look at the speaker most of the times but go back to the target when the speaker has just finished a point. My Note: this is a very good technique and will make your whole body language follow naturally.

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The Flooding Smile Dont flash an immediate smile when you greet someone, as though anyone who walked into your line of sight would be the beneficiary. Instead, look at the other persons face for a second. Soak in their persona. Then let a big, warm, responsive smile flood over your face and overflow into your eyes.

It will engulf the recipient like a warm wave. The split-second delay convinces people your flooding smile is genuine and only for them. Sticky Eyes Pretend your eyes 1.

When you must look away, do it ever so slowly, reluctantly, stretching the gooey taffy until the tiny string finally breaks. Epoxy Eyes — This brazen technique packs a powerful punch. Watch your target person even when someone else is talking. No matter who is speaking, keep looking at the man or woman you want to impact.

Hang by Your Teeth — Visualize a circus iron-jaw bit hanging from the frame of every door you walk through. Take a bite and, with it firmly between your teeth, let it swoop you to the peak of the big top.

When you hang by your teeth, every muscle is stretched into perfect posture position. The instant the two of you are introduced, reward your new acquaintance. Give the warm smile, the total-body turn, and the undivided attention you would give a tiny tyke who crawled up to your feet, turned a precious face up to yours, and beamed a big toothless grin.

Hello Old Friend — When meeting someone, imagine he or she is an old friend an old customer, an old beloved, or someone else you had great affection for. How sad, the vicissitudes of life tore you two asunder. But, holy mackerel, now the party the meeting, the convention has reunited you with your long-lost old friend! The joyful experience starts a remarkable chain reaction in your body from the subconscious softening of your eyebrows to the positioning of your toes—and everything between.

Limit the Fidget — Whenever your conversation really counts, let your nose itch, your ear tingle, or your foot prickle. Do not fidget, twitch, wiggle, squirm, or scratch.

And above all, keep your paws away from your puss. Then plan your moves accordingly. If a horse can do it, so can a human. People will say you pick up on everything. You never miss a trick. HEAR yourself chatting comfortably with everyone. FEEL the pleasure of knowing you are in peak form and everyone is gravitating toward you. Then it all happens automatically. If you ever want to bring people around to your thoughts, you must match their mood and voice tone, if only for a moment.

Prosaic with Passion — Worried about your first words? Almost anything you say at first is fine. No matter how prosaic the text, an empathetic mood, a positive demeanor, and passionate delivery make you sound exciting.

Always Wear a Whatzit — Whenever you go to a gathering, wear or carry something unusual to give people who find you the delightful stranger across the crowded room an excuse to approach. Whoozat — Whoozat is the most effective, least used by nonpoliticians meeting-people device ever contrived. Simply ask the party giver to make the introduction, or pump for a few facts that you can immediately turn into icebreakers.

Eavesdrop In — No Whatzit? No host for Whoozat? No problem! Just sidle up behind the swarm of folks you want to infiltrate and open your ears. Will they get over it? Will you be in the conversation? Learn some engaging facts about your hometown that conversational partners can comment on.

Throw out some delicious facts about your job for new acquaintances to munch on. Bait the conversational hook to get them in the swim of things. The evidence is bound to slip out.

Then spring on that subject like a sleuth on to a slip of the tongue. The Swiveling Spotlight — When you meet someone, imagine a giant revolving spotlight between you. If you shine it brightly enough, the stranger will be blinded to the fact that you have hardly said a word about yourself. The longer you keep it shining away from you, the more interesting he or she finds you. Parroting — Never be left speechless again. Like a parrot, simply repeat the last few words your conversation partner says.

That puts the ball right back in his or her court, and then all you need to do is listen. Choose an appropriate one from their repertoire that the crowd will enjoy. Then shine the spotlight by requesting a repeat performance. Ac-cen-tu-ate the Pos-i-tive — When first meeting someone, lock your closet door and save your skeletons for later.

You and your new good friend can invite the skeletons out, have a good laugh, and dance over their bones later in the relationship. The Latest News. Anything that happened today is good material. Could he refer business to me? Buy from me? Hire me? Marry my sister? Become my buddy? Your Personal Thesaurus — Look up some common words you use every day in the thesaurus. Then, like slipping your feet into a new pair of shoes, slip your tongue into a few new words to see how they fit.

If you like them, start making permanent replacements. Remember, only fifty words makes the difference between a rich, creative vocabulary and an average, middle-of-the-road one. You emerge as a confident big cat, not a lonely little stray, hungry for quick connection with a stranger. Comm-YOU-nication — Start every appropriate sentence with you. When you sprinkle you as liberally as salt and pepper throughout your conversation, your listeners find it an irresistible spice. The Exclusive Smile — If you flash everybody the same smile, like a Confederate dollar, it loses value.

When meeting groups of people, grace each with a distinct smile. Let your smiles grow out of the beauty big players find in each new face. If one person in a group is more important to you than the others, reserve an especially big, flooding smile just for him or her.

Not even when hell freezes over? Not unless you want to sound dumb as a doorknob. Find a few bon mots to let casually slide off your tongue on chosen occasions. If you want to be notable, dream up a crazy quotable. Call a spade a spade. Trash the Teasing — A dead giveaway of a little cat is his or her proclivity to tease. Nevertheless, the big cats will have the last one. A pro throws the ball with the receiver always in mind. Before throwing out any news, keep your receiver in mind.

Then deliver it with a smile, a sigh, or a sob. Not according to how you feel about the news, but how the receiver will take it. The Broken Record — Whenever someone persists in questioning you on an unwelcome subject, simply repeat your original response. Use precisely the same words in precisely the same tone of voice. Hearing it again usually quiets them down.

If your rude interrogator hangs on like a leech, your next repetition never fails to flick them off. If the queen bee has a drone sitting with her, find a way to involve him in the conversation. Scramble Therapy — Once a month, scramble your life. Participate in a sport, go to an exhibition, hear a lecture on something totally out of your experience. You get 80 percent of the right lingo and insider questions from just one exposure. Learn a Little Jobbledygook — Big winners speak Jobbledygook as a second language.

What is Jobbledygook? Why speak it? It makes you sound like an insider.


How to Talk to Anyone: Summary & Review

But wait a minute! So what is it? Some people suspect they inherited it. Others say they married it, or were just plain lucky.


How to Talk to Anyone: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships






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